No Use For A Title

I am making this post from one of the Macs in the main computer lab. Don't laugh, it could happen to you one day too. From my vantage point under the room's camera, I and I alone have full immunity from its neverending gaze.

On an unrelated note, when I am older I hope to own at least one piece of property that has a cave on it. It doesn't necessarily have to be a natural cave; I could always have one made as long as it has cavelike characteristics, including the ability to prevent the sun's light from finding me. In addition, I would keep a pressure chamber or something similar in the cave to fully simulate the conditions that I would prefer this planet to have.

To discourage visitors, I will keep some form of beast in the cave that is at least capable of downing one or two reasonably equipped (i.e., they may have guns, but no high-end exploding weapons like grenades) people. Even if such a group did take down my chosen beast, they would then have to deal with me and the anger I would no doubt feel upon not only having to find a new beast, but being roused from my pressure chamber.

It would be a horrible thing indeed, for all parties involved.

I will also bury the bodies of any such trespassers in an area near the cave, perhaps in a small forest next to it. The resulting buildup of negative energy would no doubt be a boon to my unique dual energy signature.

Oh, another idea. I will have a tunnel leading from my house (probably somewhere in the basement) to the cave. To prevent guests or intruders from using this tunnel, I will regularly fill it with carbon monoxide gas. Take that, air breathers! Of course, to avoid any unwanted accidents, I will label the tunnel as such and anyone who won't take my word for it on such a thing deserves their fate.

And now, having forgotten completely the original reason I began this post, I bid you adieu.